Relationships - Domestic Abuse
What is a relationship?
- A state of being related or connected
- Association by blood or marriage
- The mutual dealings, connections or feelings that exist between people
What is domestic abuse?
- The use or threat of physical, sexual, emotional and other forms of abuse by one person over another with whom they have or have had a close intimate relationship with by using power in order to control that person.
Forms of domestic abuse
- Physical - Hitting, biting, punching, kicking, burning, using objects, throwing objects, slapping, hair pulling, spitting
- Sexual - sexual assault, forced sexual activity, rape
- Verbal - Name calling, constantly putting down, criticism, humiliation, fear of silence, harassment, shouting
- Emotional - Criticism, humiliation, threats, removal of friendship group, mind games, guilt trip, prevention from visiting friends or family, controlling what clothes you wear, harassment, isolation, constant checking up by phone or text.
- Financial - Removal of financial independence, prevention of getting a job, no access to joint account
Relationships should be an equal partnership. If you experience any of the above - you don't have to put up with it!
Why do people stay in an abusive relationship?
- They want the abuser to stop
- They have children
- They do not know what help is available
- They think it's their fault
- No confidence to start over
- Security
- Scared of being on their own
- Low self esteem
- They think their partner will change
- They have nowhere to go
- No job/Job
- Threatened not to leave
Domestic abuse can happen to anyone but that doesn't mean you have to live with it
Healthy Relationships include;
- Respect - Take responsibility for making sure we respect our partner
- Effort - everyone needs to make an effort
- Sharing - sharing caring and listening are so important!
- Pleasing - Both parties in the relationship matter, not just our own views or choices
- Equality - Treat each other equally
- Consent - Just because you are in a relationship does not mean consent, make sure you are both deciding when being intimate
- Trust - the foundation of a good relationship
Respect Checklist!
- Willing to compromise
- Lets you feel comfortable to be yourself
- Able to admit being wrong
- Resolves conflict by talking honestly
- Enables you to feel safe being with them
- Respects your feelings, opinions and your friends
- Accepts you saying no to things you don't want to do
- Accepts you changing your mind
- Respects your wishes if you want to end the relationship
When someone loves you, you feel valued, respected and free to be yourself
Useful Contacts
Bexley Women's Aid - 0208 301 1536
Samaritans Bexley - 0208 301 1010
National Domestic Violence Helpline - 0808 2000 247
Galop (LGBT) - 0800 999 5428
Men's Advice Line - 0808 801 0372
Respect - 0808 802 4040 / 0808 801 0327
Bexley Women's Aid - 0208 301 1536
Samaritans Bexley - 0208 301 1010
National Domestic Violence Helpline - 0808 2000 247
Galop (LGBT) - 0800 999 5428
Men's Advice Line - 0808 801 0372
Respect - 0808 802 4040 / 0808 801 0327